Economic Christmas card

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(The text below comes from a the Christmas card that I and my family sent out to some of our friends and family.)

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays from the Evans family!

There is no RECESSION of Christmas spirit at the Evans home this year, despite the ECONOMIC DOWNTURN. We have moved into our new home in Provo, which represents our own little MORTGAGE-BACKED SECURITY. However, a remaining problem is that our landscaping still has a tendency to cause GREAT DEPRESSION.
Rick's UNEMPLOYMENT RATE has decreased due to his finishing graduate studies at the University of Texas at Austin and starting his new job as an Assistant Professor of Economics at BYU.

Marty has more projects going right now than BEN BERNANKE and HENRY POULSON combined. She has been hosting family, helping out with William's and Jane's classes at the elementary school, and working on making our biggest COLLATERALIZED DEBT OBLIGATION (our house) into a beautiful home. With everything happening on the home front, it sometimes feels like our HOUSING BUBBLE might burst.

The biggest ASSETS in our TREASURY are William (8), Jane (6), and Katie (2). William is turning into a wonderful young boy who will often BAIL OUT his parents by being a good big brother to his two younger sisters. Jane is a sweet INVESTOR in our family's happiness, although she occasionally meets with some COUNTERPARTY RISK from her other two siblings. Katie is best described as a two-and-a-half year old STIMULUS PACKAGE. She is an extremely energetic kid with startling upper body strength (this is no joke).

In summary, our FHI (Family Happiness Index) has increased 4.7% on a seasonally adjusted year over year basis. With Marty's careful OPEN MARKET OPERATIONS and Rick's LABOR MARKET INTERVENTIONS, we hope to avoid any DEFLATION in this number. We wish you a merry Christmas and a happy holiday season. Please feel free to DEPOSIT yourselves on our doorstep any time.

Sincerely,

Rick, Marty, Will, Jane, and Katie

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